18 years ago I broke my bottom. I literally broke my bottom. I fell back against a bar stool (sober I might add), chipped my coccyx and as a result have had a right royal pain in the backside ever since.
Over the years I have endured excruciatingly long plane flights, cooped up like a battery hen, eyes watering with pain and cursing the lack of legroom. I have had to suffer the humiliation of carting around a cushion shaped like a toilet seat and have spent countless hours and god knows how much money to voluntarily be poked, prodded and cracked on chiropractor’s table around the world.
Has any of it really helped? No, not really. Once a bad back, always a bad back. Short of a full spinal transplant any treatment only temporarily elevates the problem, it never solves it. All these years on and my back is as bad as ever. Worse probably, as the pain from my chipped bottom has now worked it’s way right up to my neck, which is now as tightly strung as the metal ropes on a suspension bridge.
Last year as my bones seized up in the cold and I was resorting to climbing out of bed at a right angle, I decided to buy one of those all singing, all dancing massage chairs (a cheaper Chinese version off Ebay which has so far has proved to work just fine). Not overly enthusiastic about the huge new addition to our bedroom (until he tried it himself), my husband claimed it took over half the room. Not true at all. A third at a push.
“I always wondered what sort of people had those chairs in their homes” he said at the time. Now he knows. Those in pain without a qualified masseur as a husband.
Now this is the sort of chair that would probably look right at home on the flight deck of the Starship Enterprise. Not for the faint hearted, it has more buttons on it than all of our remote controls combined. It can also squeeze you into a vice lock and pummel you senseless before you have even had a chance to settle back and relax.
Recently, with my Vertigo picking up speed, a crick in my neck and my shoulders knotted like a Boy Scouts tent rope, I thought that perhaps it was time I got myself some further treatment. Reluctant to go back down the ‘You really must relax while I crack your neck like a chicken’ route, I started hunting around for a slightly less painful alternative and was given the details of a nearby McTimoney Therapist.
This form of chiropractic treatment is a much more gentler technique than the normal bone popping variety, combining soft tissue release, trigger point therapy and sports massage. It still works to adjust the bones of your body, to maintain correct alignment of your spine and pelvis and to ensure your body’s nerve supply works efficiently, but unlike some other treatments that I have tried, this one is designed to eliminate the cause, not just treat the symptoms.
Two sessions in and I can already feel a real improvement. I can now turn my head without first moving the rest of my body, so that in itself is a bonus and makes driving somewhat safer. While there is undoubtedly plenty of work to do and stubborn muscles that still need to be coaxed into submission, for the first time in along time I feel like I might actually have a chance to get to the bottom of the problem. The place where 18 years ago it all began.
Having a bad back can take over your life and limit everything you do. It becomes so much a part of who you are that over the years you actually forget what it is like to live painfree.
If you are living in Perth and suffering away with a dodgy back, migraines, sciatica, sports injuries or general aches and pains, then I would highly recommend that you give McTimoney therapy a shot and call Paul Dupker on (08) 93422523 / 0424296620.
And no, I’m not being paid to say this … though if this tip helps you out feel free to pay me for the good advice!